2011/12/24
Japan - Part 6: Random Pics
Japan - Part 5: Textile Stuff
Mom and I dyed with pomegranate juice, using no mordants. Mama prepared the boucle, (which turned out to be 100% cashmere with no binding acrylic,) while I washed the NZ merino with scale on. I didn't wash the merino well enough so it ended up dyeing unevenly.
Late afternoon sun played tricks with the colors, and this is the best I could do. The undyed merino dyed pale tentative coffee-color; the originally ugly light brown merino boucle dyed complex/muddy yelllow-greeny brown.
Initially I was going to weave with one of these in the warp and the other in the weft, but after seeing more wool Mom dyed with pomegranate in the past, (above), and the scarf she wove and has been wearing a while, I used the boucle and a slightly sturdier wool, (she thinks Polwarth,) in the warp, and the boucle in the weft. I didn't wind it elegantly the first time around so I wasted quite a bit of warp (two meters on the board,) but I used the full 60cm width of Mama's rigid heddle. It's super light. I'll post pics as soon as I wash it this afternoon.
And this was the only completed piece from the last seven weeks. But...
I found the blank cutout figures in a stationary store just before I left. I didn't have the right moment to introduce it to my almost-six-year-old niece until the very last evening. It was worth it, though, because in the less-than-an-hour we had before dinner, she and I had a hoot making up these little friends.
The pack was inexpensive and cute; with no rhyme or reason I expected perhaps one link of 10 or 12 little figures but the pack contained 10 or 12 links of six little girls! I've been thinking I might go for the boy pack as it's possible to add skirts to make boys into girls; that way I can have both genders.
Dad flippantly suggested I make hair like my niece - when I did, she liked it very much she not only pinched mine, but requested a second one. So, the top row is mine, more or less completed, while the second is hers, and she was working on decorating the girl in the blue dress.
And this was the only completed piece from the last seven weeks. But...
The pack was inexpensive and cute; with no rhyme or reason I expected perhaps one link of 10 or 12 little figures but the pack contained 10 or 12 links of six little girls! I've been thinking I might go for the boy pack as it's possible to add skirts to make boys into girls; that way I can have both genders.
Dad flippantly suggested I make hair like my niece - when I did, she liked it very much she not only pinched mine, but requested a second one. So, the top row is mine, more or less completed, while the second is hers, and she was working on decorating the girl in the blue dress.
Holiday Wishes
I made it home on Tuesday and had a lovely Christmas Lunch with Group R members on Thursday, but otherwise been dazed and confused and waking up to some all-too-vivid dreams. Most of all I've been having difficulty readjusting to my excruciatingly cruisey "normal" life, though I have managed to do half a dozen loads of laundry in four days. (Compared to the normal two or three a week.)
The flip side is I've been enjoying the empty-headedness, not planning, not thinking, not worrying, just existing, which, left on my own device, is nearly impossible to achieve.
I've slowly come to realize 2011 is coming to a close, (I really was that busy the last seven weeks,) and feel disappointed my weaving year wasn't as productive as I had planned, due mostly to my trouble with my left arm, (and the cursed mountain of the second lot of firewood,) but then there was the flood in Queensland, the quake in Christchurch, (and a few other places like Chile, Turkey, and China from memory?), the quake/tsunami/nuclear fallout in Japan, and dad's ill health to contend with. That I am not depressed or crazy-hyper around now should perhaps count as a small achievement.
The afternoon I came home Mom asked, and at Group R lunch Ronnie asked, if I was back in the creative mode; I had to think what that is. I'm not, in as much as I don't have gazillion future plans rushing in my head; luckily, I have a few warps which have been planned a while ago and all that needs doing is weaving them, left arm permitting.
Group R met once while I was away. (There was a meeting planned a week after I was supposed to return.) They decided on a small homework over the holiday season, the instructions to which reads:
"Each of us will take a 30-cm square of white or natural-coloured fabric and do whatever we want to it (but nothing overtly artistic) while keeping a journal about the process. It has to remain the same piece at the end of the process. No cutting or stitching. No marks, no pencils, etc. We’ll bring our pieces to the next meeting. Maria has already started and is discussing her progress in her blog.
"Some of the examples of things to do (in addition to the ones listed above) are:
* Wipe the table with it
* Do something to it when you’re angry
* Make prints using cut vegetables
* Drip ink, tea, paint or anything else on it
* Rub it with dirt, handprints, fingerprints
* Tie it with string and swing it at a wall
* Use as a napkin and document your meal
* Chew on it
* Eat colourful candy and lick it"
I was so out of my head and in my then-real life, living from second to second helping Mom and meeting Dad's demands, when I read the instructions I didn't want to waste my life on any airy-fairy (OK, arty-f@rty) homework. But you know I do like to participate, so I feel a square piece of fabric coming up. Or not. The others were having fun with it from what they discussed during lunch.
This is my 2011 summary; not the overlong list of things I did do and longer of what I had intended but didn't manage so hope to do in the coming year. But this was my year.
And here is a typically Nelson holiday wish to you and yours: Happy Holidays! (More Japan pics coming up incrementally.)
The flip side is I've been enjoying the empty-headedness, not planning, not thinking, not worrying, just existing, which, left on my own device, is nearly impossible to achieve.
I've slowly come to realize 2011 is coming to a close, (I really was that busy the last seven weeks,) and feel disappointed my weaving year wasn't as productive as I had planned, due mostly to my trouble with my left arm, (and the cursed mountain of the second lot of firewood,) but then there was the flood in Queensland, the quake in Christchurch, (and a few other places like Chile, Turkey, and China from memory?), the quake/tsunami/nuclear fallout in Japan, and dad's ill health to contend with. That I am not depressed or crazy-hyper around now should perhaps count as a small achievement.
The afternoon I came home Mom asked, and at Group R lunch Ronnie asked, if I was back in the creative mode; I had to think what that is. I'm not, in as much as I don't have gazillion future plans rushing in my head; luckily, I have a few warps which have been planned a while ago and all that needs doing is weaving them, left arm permitting.
Group R met once while I was away. (There was a meeting planned a week after I was supposed to return.) They decided on a small homework over the holiday season, the instructions to which reads:
"Each of us will take a 30-cm square of white or natural-coloured fabric and do whatever we want to it (but nothing overtly artistic) while keeping a journal about the process. It has to remain the same piece at the end of the process. No cutting or stitching. No marks, no pencils, etc. We’ll bring our pieces to the next meeting. Maria has already started and is discussing her progress in her blog.
"Some of the examples of things to do (in addition to the ones listed above) are:
* Wipe the table with it
* Do something to it when you’re angry
* Make prints using cut vegetables
* Drip ink, tea, paint or anything else on it
* Rub it with dirt, handprints, fingerprints
* Tie it with string and swing it at a wall
* Use as a napkin and document your meal
* Chew on it
* Eat colourful candy and lick it"
I was so out of my head and in my then-real life, living from second to second helping Mom and meeting Dad's demands, when I read the instructions I didn't want to waste my life on any airy-fairy (OK, arty-f@rty) homework. But you know I do like to participate, so I feel a square piece of fabric coming up. Or not. The others were having fun with it from what they discussed during lunch.
This is my 2011 summary; not the overlong list of things I did do and longer of what I had intended but didn't manage so hope to do in the coming year. But this was my year.
And here is a typically Nelson holiday wish to you and yours: Happy Holidays! (More Japan pics coming up incrementally.)
2011/12/16
Japan - Part 4: Laughing All the Way
Time flies when you're having fun and we've been laughing a whole lot, my parents and I. This trip has given me great insights into where I'm headed in 30 years, (no denying these two supplied me with genes, we are scary-alike,) reminding me how important a good sense of humor is; how not taking myself, politics and the weather forecast (!!) too seriously can make life more enjoyable; and how important regular exercise is.
My parents' memory is incredibly bad, and we have to discuss the same things over and over again. This makes Mama feel incompetent, and I remind her I'm not much better, which is true. It's the too-buzy-ness and the preoccupation with Dad's new diet regime that's consuming her attention/head space/time/energy, but two months on things are starting to settle a bit. Dad, on the other hand, is adamant Mama/"they"/bureaucracy is in the wrong, and that we forget/neglect/purposely omit telling him stuff, or we move stuff without telling him.
Dad's eyesight has been bad for years, but he continues to blog; the writing gives him great pleasure, but his pointing and clicking, not so, and every time an unexpected page/error message/request for account/password appears, it's the CIA/(insert convenient foe)/the computer interfering with "his Internet". I can only chide him, but sometimes I say something contrary to what I said before just to see if he notices, which sometimes he does!
In addition, both of their hearing has (have?) gotten worse, though the effect is inconsistent I can't modify my speech well. Much seems to depend on their health and mindset, so I could be speaking at the same level but sometimes I am too loud and sometimes too soft, and sometimes too loud for one and inaudible to the other. Their selective hearing is a source of great laughter; if I'm with Mama in another room and kid/criticize her or suggest something, Dad mysteriously hears me and shouts enthusiastic agreement or opportunistic criticism from the other room. Yet sometimes we can chide Dad while in the same room without his hearing us.
The "Use it or Loose It" balance has been astonishingly difficult. Mindset affects old people's physical health much more than I expected, which makes them incapable of mundane chores one day, but capable of great work the next. Dad has always been a hard worker at work but a lazy, era-appropriate husband at home, so we can never tell if he indeed needs help or just wants to interrupt Mama to show who is boss, (which he does sometimes.) From mid-October to early December, he was really sick but we and the doctors could never gage how much, Dad has multiple health issues, doctors tend to lump his problems as age-related, which doesn't go down well with my parents.
Mom and I want him to do as much as he can so his muscles and brain don't deteriorate further, but we want to be kind to him, too, and can't seem to find a happy place. In November we didn't expect him to see the new year, but now we think he'll be good for another few years, (though his norm will continue to deteriorate and Mama and he will have to get use to this,) so "using" what abilities he's got left has become more important and we try to stick with tough love, which needless to say, he finds annoying.
Stuff I've trained to do this side of, oh, 2002, in trying to improve my weaving has improved my life in more ways than I knew: trying to experience textiles, art and life with all my senses, trying to not worry about the outcome and experimenting for the sake of experimenting, and in general keeping an open heart to the universe. I've been sharing some of it with Mama, and intend to leave a list for her to glance at when she feels stuck in a dead end. I have all of you to thank, as well as my art/textile friends in Nelson and Marlborough. I'm lucky to be in your company, and to be able retell Mama stories you shared and show her pictures you've shown.
Now I've really got to either weave a piece, or pack stuff I need to post; the parents have been on my case about the packing for a few weeks, but now even I think it's time.
PS: I owe a few of you personal email replies, but I think they will have to wait until I'm home next week. A lumped but heartfelt apology.
My parents' memory is incredibly bad, and we have to discuss the same things over and over again. This makes Mama feel incompetent, and I remind her I'm not much better, which is true. It's the too-buzy-ness and the preoccupation with Dad's new diet regime that's consuming her attention/head space/time/energy, but two months on things are starting to settle a bit. Dad, on the other hand, is adamant Mama/"they"/bureaucracy is in the wrong, and that we forget/neglect/purposely omit telling him stuff, or we move stuff without telling him.
Dad's eyesight has been bad for years, but he continues to blog; the writing gives him great pleasure, but his pointing and clicking, not so, and every time an unexpected page/error message/request for account/password appears, it's the CIA/(insert convenient foe)/the computer interfering with "his Internet". I can only chide him, but sometimes I say something contrary to what I said before just to see if he notices, which sometimes he does!
In addition, both of their hearing has (have?) gotten worse, though the effect is inconsistent I can't modify my speech well. Much seems to depend on their health and mindset, so I could be speaking at the same level but sometimes I am too loud and sometimes too soft, and sometimes too loud for one and inaudible to the other. Their selective hearing is a source of great laughter; if I'm with Mama in another room and kid/criticize her or suggest something, Dad mysteriously hears me and shouts enthusiastic agreement or opportunistic criticism from the other room. Yet sometimes we can chide Dad while in the same room without his hearing us.
The "Use it or Loose It" balance has been astonishingly difficult. Mindset affects old people's physical health much more than I expected, which makes them incapable of mundane chores one day, but capable of great work the next. Dad has always been a hard worker at work but a lazy, era-appropriate husband at home, so we can never tell if he indeed needs help or just wants to interrupt Mama to show who is boss, (which he does sometimes.) From mid-October to early December, he was really sick but we and the doctors could never gage how much, Dad has multiple health issues, doctors tend to lump his problems as age-related, which doesn't go down well with my parents.
Mom and I want him to do as much as he can so his muscles and brain don't deteriorate further, but we want to be kind to him, too, and can't seem to find a happy place. In November we didn't expect him to see the new year, but now we think he'll be good for another few years, (though his norm will continue to deteriorate and Mama and he will have to get use to this,) so "using" what abilities he's got left has become more important and we try to stick with tough love, which needless to say, he finds annoying.
Stuff I've trained to do this side of, oh, 2002, in trying to improve my weaving has improved my life in more ways than I knew: trying to experience textiles, art and life with all my senses, trying to not worry about the outcome and experimenting for the sake of experimenting, and in general keeping an open heart to the universe. I've been sharing some of it with Mama, and intend to leave a list for her to glance at when she feels stuck in a dead end. I have all of you to thank, as well as my art/textile friends in Nelson and Marlborough. I'm lucky to be in your company, and to be able retell Mama stories you shared and show her pictures you've shown.
Now I've really got to either weave a piece, or pack stuff I need to post; the parents have been on my case about the packing for a few weeks, but now even I think it's time.
PS: I owe a few of you personal email replies, but I think they will have to wait until I'm home next week. A lumped but heartfelt apology.
2011/12/15
Japan - Part 3: Mini Exhibition
Today was Mama's last lesson for the year and her students were kind enough to bring a few of their favorite pieces from the past year and a half of weaving.
Mrs E's knotting. The colors are a bit more subtle than they appear here. The piece, she tells us, usually sits on one chair in the living room but nobody is allowed to sit on this piece, so it is quickly removed whenever the chair is needed.
Mrs E has a gray silk kimono jacket, and she slashed the leftover fabric intending to make a matching bag. After weaving the fabric, she didn't have the heart to cut into it, so now it's a good-sized wall-hanging.
Mrs T's knotting. Mama must like teaching it.
Mrs T's latest piece: tapestry. This piece looks much better against a dark brown background. After the last session, we had a robust discussion and demonstration on how to show woven work at their best.
Mrs Y's knotting, framed in Mama's fav style. In real life, this colors are a little brighter and more nuanced.
Mrs Y's wall-hanging, containing lovely subtle color variations. The frame/hanger is one of many Mama bought in India many years ago. Do forgive the uncouth background.
The very best of luck to these three lovely weavers in the coming year.
Mrs T's fav scarf; she's still nervous about wet-finishing, so she's going to wear this as is to an End of Year party, and then take the plunge in the new year.
The very best of luck to these three lovely weavers in the coming year.
2011/12/14
Japan - Part 2: Responsible Party
I've been trying to make up for 50-odd years of being The Naughty Daughter, The Expensive Daughter and The Daughter Who Doesn't Help Around the House. But they aren't always happy as they feel I've been "working too hard", wearing too little clothes, (they like to set the room temp at "tropical" most days), and I can't remember what all else I'm doing wrong. But we're laughing a lot together, too.
I promise I will post photos and stories once I settle. I go home on Monday.
2011/11/12
Japan - Part 1
Life has been a bit different of late.
Not only has Mom turned into Dad's full time caregiver, (and thanks for your emails; dad isn't in that bad of a shape, but his life is very limited and he needs Mom around all the time); I the housekeeper, and Ben the cook and handyman. Ben has extended his stay by a week so we can fix everything that needs fixing around the house and get it really ready for winter, and me by four; I might end up staying longer.
So, not a lot of outing for the two of us yet, but we've been photographing nostalgic shopping streets reminiscent of the 1960's near my parents' house, which has been great fun. Next week, we hope to go to the one near my folks' first home, where we lived until I was 9; that street, though very cramped and dingy, is thriving and was featured on a TV show a couple of nights ago.
Traditionally, shopping streets sprung up on the side of main highways and on the sides of the streets leading up to temples, shrines, and other "religious" sites. I wonder if you can see the green roof of the gate to this Buddhist statue.
As in many areas of the world, folks used to have a shop on the bottom floor and live on the top. This is an old kimono shop, both selling kimono and accessories, but also offering to dye/redye kimono and fabric. On the small section on the left, you can still buy undyed kimono silk and request special dye work.
Though these shops are separate buildings, many shopping centers covered the street section in the 60's and 70's; most allow vehicle traffic, but this street allowed foot and bicycle traffic only. Lovely. There were also many food shops that cooked what they sold on the premise; I might go back and photograph two tofu shops, my favorites.
Metal product advertisement popular in the 50's; these were often nailed on the side of shops and even some private homes. At least one of the products here is still alive and well, I think.
We did endeavor to go to an exhibition of Mingei craft pieces collected by Yanagi Soetsu, but I was exhausted just making my way to the department store, (my hometown of Yokohama has the population the same as whole of New Zealand, and just making our way across Yokohama train station, we ran into about one-third of them!) we checked the gift shop, the catalog, and the exhibition end date, (December 4) and went home!!
But don't get me wrong; it's not been all work and no fun. For one thing there is Internet at the parents' house, and Mom and I have been discussing and planning her hitherto biggest project, a simple garment. It's one that requires two rectangles, but Mom knows sewing and knitting, and she's been considering neck options as a good warm collar is important in this project. We've cut out crude facsimile pieces out of old fabric to fine-tune size, but there is a lot more to consider. I always knew Mom is a much more versatile and adventurous weaver than I, and it's been fun planning.
Because she teaches weaving to neighbors as well, only a rigid heddle is available for use right away, so I'm thinking of doing a hand-manipulated loopy thing on a small scarf, too. More on these later.
Not only has Mom turned into Dad's full time caregiver, (and thanks for your emails; dad isn't in that bad of a shape, but his life is very limited and he needs Mom around all the time); I the housekeeper, and Ben the cook and handyman. Ben has extended his stay by a week so we can fix everything that needs fixing around the house and get it really ready for winter, and me by four; I might end up staying longer.
So, not a lot of outing for the two of us yet, but we've been photographing nostalgic shopping streets reminiscent of the 1960's near my parents' house, which has been great fun. Next week, we hope to go to the one near my folks' first home, where we lived until I was 9; that street, though very cramped and dingy, is thriving and was featured on a TV show a couple of nights ago.
Though these shops are separate buildings, many shopping centers covered the street section in the 60's and 70's; most allow vehicle traffic, but this street allowed foot and bicycle traffic only. Lovely. There were also many food shops that cooked what they sold on the premise; I might go back and photograph two tofu shops, my favorites.
We did endeavor to go to an exhibition of Mingei craft pieces collected by Yanagi Soetsu, but I was exhausted just making my way to the department store, (my hometown of Yokohama has the population the same as whole of New Zealand, and just making our way across Yokohama train station, we ran into about one-third of them!) we checked the gift shop, the catalog, and the exhibition end date, (December 4) and went home!!
But don't get me wrong; it's not been all work and no fun. For one thing there is Internet at the parents' house, and Mom and I have been discussing and planning her hitherto biggest project, a simple garment. It's one that requires two rectangles, but Mom knows sewing and knitting, and she's been considering neck options as a good warm collar is important in this project. We've cut out crude facsimile pieces out of old fabric to fine-tune size, but there is a lot more to consider. I always knew Mom is a much more versatile and adventurous weaver than I, and it's been fun planning.
Because she teaches weaving to neighbors as well, only a rigid heddle is available for use right away, so I'm thinking of doing a hand-manipulated loopy thing on a small scarf, too. More on these later.
2011/10/26
Life's Curveballs
Whether it is a natural progression of my condition, the medication I started last Friday, the excitement of Rugby World Cup and its aftermath, or my virtuoso aptitude for slacking off, I've been living in a haze for the last little while.
I don't remember feeling so "out of it" when I was on the same medication in 09, but back then I was much worse, so perhaps there was no head space for monitoring. It's like being suspended in time and space; or getting a heavy dose of dentist's laughing gas; or mildly intoxicated. I have a vague recognition I'm not getting anything done, and a strangely remote sense of frustration I'm wasting my life, but most days I sit quietly and wait for the haze to go away.
I can't read, think, or even look at photos and graphics, but I have been watching reruns of mindless TV shows, (not good docos), and sleeping a lot. That's another thing; the medication messed with my sleeping pattern for a few days, but that seems to have come right. When I remember, I try mild exercises or gardening, and sometimes they've worked, sometimes I fell on the floor with exhaustion and just stayed still for a while.
Arm pain got bad enough I've have acupuncture treatment twice in six days with one more at the end of the week. Acupuncture works for me, but the treatment takes a toll, leaving me dysfunctional for half a day afterwards. So, another good reason to stay still.
Commitments and due dates can be good at times like these, it forces me to concentrate and get something done. I had to prepare a dozen posts for the group blogs today, which entailed reading and making sense of the instructions, which are usually simple and straight-forward but not at a time like this. It took me six and a half hours but I got them done and scheduled.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not sad, or in a bad way. I just feel suspended while the rest of the world moves forward, like in the Matrix movies. What I have been musing, very vaguely because that's all I can manage, is how disproportionately long the time you prepare/anticipate an event is to the duration of that event. And yes, I'm talking about my impending trip. I think we've been trying to get ready for the last month or so, and we're only going away for three weeks. Hopefully, in that time, I'll find my way back to being present in my life. And get back on the loom bench.
You gotta laugh at what life throws at you. Because it's not hard.
I don't remember feeling so "out of it" when I was on the same medication in 09, but back then I was much worse, so perhaps there was no head space for monitoring. It's like being suspended in time and space; or getting a heavy dose of dentist's laughing gas; or mildly intoxicated. I have a vague recognition I'm not getting anything done, and a strangely remote sense of frustration I'm wasting my life, but most days I sit quietly and wait for the haze to go away.
I can't read, think, or even look at photos and graphics, but I have been watching reruns of mindless TV shows, (not good docos), and sleeping a lot. That's another thing; the medication messed with my sleeping pattern for a few days, but that seems to have come right. When I remember, I try mild exercises or gardening, and sometimes they've worked, sometimes I fell on the floor with exhaustion and just stayed still for a while.
Arm pain got bad enough I've have acupuncture treatment twice in six days with one more at the end of the week. Acupuncture works for me, but the treatment takes a toll, leaving me dysfunctional for half a day afterwards. So, another good reason to stay still.
Commitments and due dates can be good at times like these, it forces me to concentrate and get something done. I had to prepare a dozen posts for the group blogs today, which entailed reading and making sense of the instructions, which are usually simple and straight-forward but not at a time like this. It took me six and a half hours but I got them done and scheduled.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not sad, or in a bad way. I just feel suspended while the rest of the world moves forward, like in the Matrix movies. What I have been musing, very vaguely because that's all I can manage, is how disproportionately long the time you prepare/anticipate an event is to the duration of that event. And yes, I'm talking about my impending trip. I think we've been trying to get ready for the last month or so, and we're only going away for three weeks. Hopefully, in that time, I'll find my way back to being present in my life. And get back on the loom bench.
2011/10/19
Mind You...
It's not that I've been cranky, but certainly powerless.
Dad went into the hospital before a long weekend in Japan, and ended up staying in the ICU for a week because he couldn't breath. He's abandoned his lifelong creed that healthy (or ill) body comes from healthy (or ill) mind, and has switched to "pity me" mode this week. Mom is still holding on to the family tradition; we make light of ill health. I'm constantly trying to gauge where the truth lies.
We've had strong spring sea wind and our chimney became either skewed or loose; last week when we had very heavy rain, we actually had a leak; pot sitting on top of the wood burner, and us listening to the drip-drop while watching the telly. I was reminded of my parents' previous home where terracotta used to get shifted or blown away in typhoons some years and containers were placed all over upstairs and we fell asleep listening to the drip-drops in autumn typhoon season. Though I've been in touch with my chimney guy, he's so busy I may not be able to get him before we leave. Meanwhile, we continue to have heavy rain every three or so days.
My problems are trivial compared to real problems folks have. But sometimes my life plays out to me like a bad play - lots of little trials without much tribulations or redeeming denumount - yet not terrible enough one can recall how bad it was. Forgettable. My life and goals have gotten smaller.
I was right to see a doctor yesterday, even though my regular guy is away, and even though I wondered if I was being a bit alarmist. I think the locum was right in getting me back on mild meds, at least for the next short while. Life of a weaver in Nelson has got to be a bit more exciting, you know. Even with two tennis elbows.
Dad went into the hospital before a long weekend in Japan, and ended up staying in the ICU for a week because he couldn't breath. He's abandoned his lifelong creed that healthy (or ill) body comes from healthy (or ill) mind, and has switched to "pity me" mode this week. Mom is still holding on to the family tradition; we make light of ill health. I'm constantly trying to gauge where the truth lies.
We've had strong spring sea wind and our chimney became either skewed or loose; last week when we had very heavy rain, we actually had a leak; pot sitting on top of the wood burner, and us listening to the drip-drop while watching the telly. I was reminded of my parents' previous home where terracotta used to get shifted or blown away in typhoons some years and containers were placed all over upstairs and we fell asleep listening to the drip-drops in autumn typhoon season. Though I've been in touch with my chimney guy, he's so busy I may not be able to get him before we leave. Meanwhile, we continue to have heavy rain every three or so days.
My problems are trivial compared to real problems folks have. But sometimes my life plays out to me like a bad play - lots of little trials without much tribulations or redeeming denumount - yet not terrible enough one can recall how bad it was. Forgettable. My life and goals have gotten smaller.
I was right to see a doctor yesterday, even though my regular guy is away, and even though I wondered if I was being a bit alarmist. I think the locum was right in getting me back on mild meds, at least for the next short while. Life of a weaver in Nelson has got to be a bit more exciting, you know. Even with two tennis elbows.
2011/10/18
Crikey...
I'm not doing much, but the arms are going crazy. I do the physiotherapist's menu once a day most days, though I suspect that's not enough. I haven't done anything strenuous in a couple of weeks, just minimum housework. What's most aggravating is by now I should know better about my condition and know how to live so the arms can be better faster, but it's not going that way. In the mornings I stare at my To Do lists and wonder what I am capable of doing that day and this has been doing my head in.
A friend has been doing my head in; she works hard at her art, she's good at what she does, but also feels she deserves more recognition and financial rewards, that people should be coming to her, and she's disgruntled; I used to enjoy talking to her a great deal, but after listening to her for most of this year, her sense of entitlement has been doing my head in for a few months.
I've had a mild virus last week. And a dental emergency the week before that, which led to major money worries for next year. Ironic as the emergency happened the day I figured if we can pay our health/life insurance in April instead of January, we won't be in such a bad shape every summer after we pay our house/contents/car insurance in November. I knew this for ages but never took action. That almost feels immaterial now; I'm shopping around for a different dentist as we don't live anywhere near the right zip code to be his patients anyway. The strangest thing is, I can manage emergency spending of three figures by scrimping and saving; four figures worry me but I can figure out a way to manage when I can approach it calmly, but a five-figure dentist fee? I can only laugh out loud and live in denial. But that's doing my head in.
In case you hadn't heard, there has been a small event talking place in New Zealand, called the Rugby World Cup. We haven't been big fans of rugby (union) for about six, seven years, (players' high salaries, drunken shenanigans, wife-/girl-friend beating and name suppression, etc,) but I've been watching almost all the games in the last two weeks. It's something I can do without using my hands much. But have you heard there is an oil spill on the east coast of the North Island of New Zealand for the last two weeks? Last night's top news item was how the All Blacks celebrated their win (against Wallabies/Australia) in their underwear! And we have an election at the end of November, with a referendum on our voting system; all four choices sound like something you pick up kissing the wrong guy or girl. And yes, all this is doing. My. Head. In.
Group R met yesterday; one member, Judy, left to concentrate on her work so now we are five and that small change made a great difference; five feels much cozier and less formal. It was good to see everybody, but nothing earth-shattering to report. Changing Threads is going ahead in 2012, but there is no size limits this time. Submission closes a fortnight before Creative Fibre National Exhibition, but they open on the same night. And five months after that, Group R's "Beginnings" exhibition opens. No, they're not doing my head in, but I'm extremely frustrated I can't work.
So, I guess, overall, I've been frustrated and angry how the second half of this year has turned out. Especially since I felt I finally got the hang of weaving more regularly, not just planning and thinking about it. It appears very often when my weaving life is on an upward swing, something happens to take away the inertia. So I've kept my head down and tried to stay calm, and have been making up and checking off items on To Do lists; mostly to do with preparing for our upcoming trip, but with art- and weaving-related things making an occasional appearance. Yeah, I feel a bit sorry for myself, but being a victim doesn't get much done, so I try to keep my head down and bum up most days.
Mom wanted hints on what her students can do on two shafts; my Log Cabin samples fit the bill. I've also posted about Silver vs. Golden Ratio in my Japanese blog so we can discuss it.
A friend has been doing my head in; she works hard at her art, she's good at what she does, but also feels she deserves more recognition and financial rewards, that people should be coming to her, and she's disgruntled; I used to enjoy talking to her a great deal, but after listening to her for most of this year, her sense of entitlement has been doing my head in for a few months.
I've had a mild virus last week. And a dental emergency the week before that, which led to major money worries for next year. Ironic as the emergency happened the day I figured if we can pay our health/life insurance in April instead of January, we won't be in such a bad shape every summer after we pay our house/contents/car insurance in November. I knew this for ages but never took action. That almost feels immaterial now; I'm shopping around for a different dentist as we don't live anywhere near the right zip code to be his patients anyway. The strangest thing is, I can manage emergency spending of three figures by scrimping and saving; four figures worry me but I can figure out a way to manage when I can approach it calmly, but a five-figure dentist fee? I can only laugh out loud and live in denial. But that's doing my head in.
In case you hadn't heard, there has been a small event talking place in New Zealand, called the Rugby World Cup. We haven't been big fans of rugby (union) for about six, seven years, (players' high salaries, drunken shenanigans, wife-/girl-friend beating and name suppression, etc,) but I've been watching almost all the games in the last two weeks. It's something I can do without using my hands much. But have you heard there is an oil spill on the east coast of the North Island of New Zealand for the last two weeks? Last night's top news item was how the All Blacks celebrated their win (against Wallabies/Australia) in their underwear! And we have an election at the end of November, with a referendum on our voting system; all four choices sound like something you pick up kissing the wrong guy or girl. And yes, all this is doing. My. Head. In.
Group R met yesterday; one member, Judy, left to concentrate on her work so now we are five and that small change made a great difference; five feels much cozier and less formal. It was good to see everybody, but nothing earth-shattering to report. Changing Threads is going ahead in 2012, but there is no size limits this time. Submission closes a fortnight before Creative Fibre National Exhibition, but they open on the same night. And five months after that, Group R's "Beginnings" exhibition opens. No, they're not doing my head in, but I'm extremely frustrated I can't work.
So, I guess, overall, I've been frustrated and angry how the second half of this year has turned out. Especially since I felt I finally got the hang of weaving more regularly, not just planning and thinking about it. It appears very often when my weaving life is on an upward swing, something happens to take away the inertia. So I've kept my head down and tried to stay calm, and have been making up and checking off items on To Do lists; mostly to do with preparing for our upcoming trip, but with art- and weaving-related things making an occasional appearance. Yeah, I feel a bit sorry for myself, but being a victim doesn't get much done, so I try to keep my head down and bum up most days.
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