Finding a New Norm

Between October or November when I started to prepare for the exhibit and that evening on the first day of my exhibit when I finished "Deep", I was frantic, so I had no problem setting out an intelligent work schedule; I didn't need a schedule. I got up, went to whichever room I had to for whichever task on hand, and worked. My studio is next to the laundry, so we always had clean clothes, but they came out of the dryer and got put on the couch straight away, so for at least the month of January, Ben picked one shirt every morning, and I ironed one shirt every morning. The rest of the house was ignored.

I thought I deserved a little break, so after my parents left, for a few days I took it easy. I'd go back to bed after Ben went to work, and read magazines and glanced at weaving books. I roamed around the house in PJs all morning, with my trusty mug in hand. I just roamed, a little disgusted with the mess, but did nothing. I bought a beautiful book on bookbinding, and read it cover to cover.

Then I cleaned, vacuumed, ironed and got ready to resume a normal life. Except I didn't know what a normal art-making life was; I wasn't sure what my new norm should be. Because I'm home, it is always easy to start the day with a bit of housework, especially on a Monday mornings. It's getting cooler, which means I bake bread, and sometimes start a soup or stew while I do the dishes in the morning. And then I start cleaning the cupboard, and, wow, it's 3 in the afternoon.

I tried a regimented schedule: morning, loom time 10AM-12PM; afternoon, design/study time 1-3PM; loom time 3.30-5.30PM. This was slightly more productive, but not at all pleasurable and even if I had a good idea, I had to stop working on it and move on. Perhaps if I continued this regime a little longer, so my mind/body might have adjusted to it and the routine would become natural, but I was restless and I wanted a little more play, so I gave this up.

It's been downhill from there. I'm actively avoiding weaving now. The gallery needs more cashmeres; my sample exchange was due 28 February; two clients are waiting for me to contact them about baby blanket commissions, and there's a cashmere order from Japan pending (and winter is over in Japan!!)... And there's an Area Exhibit (small scale, but at present, the most important annual event for me) for which I should be preparing, in addition to the Guild's annual theme, and the Guild's other fiberart project... And I still don't want to do anything.

I did a tiny bit of bookbinding, and painted a couple of nice pages in the visual diary, and started some friends blogging and set up a quasi web site for one, and joined the Toastmasters; all of these have been good and enjoyable, but no weaving. And I can't explain why.

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