I Feel Anger and Sadness

I have persisted with "Women who Run with Wolves" up to about page 70, though nothing has resonated with me, yet.

The only thing I thought of, so far, is the author keeps referring to her heritage and family history, and I come back to how har it is for some of us to do that. I've never tried seriously, because I'm not too interested in distance ancestors, but both my parents' families were in Tokyo during the war, so there are absolutely no photos from my mother's childhood, in any of the extended family's homes, and just one blurry one of my grandmother who died about a week after the war ended. Not to mention any kind of documents.

My dad's parents had some acquaintances in the country, so they evacuated during the last months. Dad, luckily, has some pictures of his siblings, who as kids died during the war.

I've been thinking about this without reaching any conclusions or cohesive thought for a while. Then someone on FB put a link which led me to this shop where old portraits are sold as vintage goods. Granted, someone must have salvaged them, and maybe even sold them, at one point for these to reach Etsy shop. I know it's nothing unique to Japan. But I find this heart-wrenching and must go find a quiet corner.


  1. I'm sorry about your sadness regarding your lost family connections to the past, Meg.
    If it is any help at all, I wrestled thru that book years ago and thought ultimately it was written by someone with too much time on their hands.

  2. I certainly have a new respect for all my friends who have survived the book. It's like going through a overgrown maze, blindfolded, at night, with sunglasses on, for me.

  3. I'm not sure why it was so highly acclaimed when it came out. Others may disagree of course.

  4. Sometimes Meg I think I have too much knowledge of some family history, the lives of certain forebears are too challenging for my generation, they overshadow us.

    We need to find our own way in the world and value our own lives without comparison to our ancestors. There is more to a good and successful life than the achievements recognised by society.

  5. What I meant to say Meg, is that maybe heritage is overrated. We just are who we are, we embody our heritage without need to know details. The details, for my family, challenge us to make our mark in the world instead of just living and being and following our own path.

  6. Meg, I know I'm late in making this comment, but "Women who Run with Wolves" did nothing for me. I read part of the first chapter and decided it was not pertinent to my life. Her metaphor is not mine and from what you are saying, it's probably not yours, either.

  7. Dorothy, I know what you mean. I understand.

    Sunny, I nearly put the book on eBay last week until Annabelle, a fellow student in my drawing class, didn't exactly talk me out of it, but she being the catalyst in my finally buying the book, kind of persuaded me, in a roundabout way, to stick it under the bed for 6 months and try it again. And if that doesn't work, it'll go on eBay.

    I think for Annabelle, she needed someone to decipher the noise in her head, and the book did it. She also reads Jung, and I can't remember ever giving that a go.


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