2009/08/11

Grumpy

I know it's probably unwise to take life lessons from TV shows, especially the lightweight drama, but I'm amazed every time I hear the line, "The important thing is, you are happy." Nobody ever said that to me. My parents' regular line was, "We trust we taught you well enough for you to do the right thing," so if I did right, they got credit, but if I did wrong, it was my fault, which it usually was because they didn't tell me when I did right.

The other line is, "Don't worry, everything will be alright." Are you kidding me? I thought every adult sighed heavily and exhaled, "Didn't you think first?" while calculating the punishment.

Boy, I'm grumpy today, aren't I?

7 comments:

Carol said...

We can't always be happy but I think it's okay to be happy as much as possible. I'm a big believer in happiness and I'm pretty sure I constantly told my kids to be happy too. My parents told me - can I now tell you? Meg, it's great to be happy.

Cate Rose said...

Sometimes we have to take our lives one moment at a time, and just be here, now. I believe this is where we find happiness, in this moment, really being in this moment fully. Our life is really nothing but present moments strung together.
So BE HAPPY, and snap out of it, will you (said infinitely lovingly)!

Dorothy said...

It's not just Japanese parents who have taken this approach to parenting! I have the impression I'm a constant frustration and disappointment to my parents, however, my sister tells me they are very positive about me in talking to other people, I'd never have known!

It is nice when people believe in you, are supportive, say good things, but actually happiness only comes from how you feel in yourself. So, be a rebel, say "I can be happy, if I want to! My choice. For me. Not going to ask your permission!" Does it work for you? Helps me.

p.s. Meg, I haven't had much to say for a bit, but I'm still a blog friend, and I like your blog.

Meg said...

Carol, so some parents DO say that? Well, blow me away, it's wonderful to know!! Dr Phil says sometimes there are things in life you couldn't get from the people you wanted to get them from, so I have to give myself. I find being happy hard because I feel like I'm slacking off. On the other hand, I get a lot of happiness from blog friends, real life freinds and Ben and Joan, so I don't know what's wrong with me.

Connie, yeah, been trying to all winter. Now, I don't think I'm really down, but just got in the habing of being down? Sounds stupid, I never thought could do it, but I suspect that's the problem.

Dorothy, I WAS the problem child - they told me so, Sister told me they told her so. But Sister told me this January that one time, Dad, of all people, spoke very proudly of something or rather I did. Can't remember what it was about, but Sister is not the kind of person to say stuff just to make me feel better, so it must be true.

Being happy, taking compliments graciously, and to me, making beautiful things, are all connected. I wish I could live in the moment, be relaxed about living, instead of constantly feeling like I'm on the run, looking ahead and checking behind me, all the time. Ben does living-in-the-mo very well, and this is a big part of why I wanted to live (as in life, not as in cohabitate) with him and I think some of it must have rubbed off on me, but boy, this is a difficult thing for me.

And yet I keep reminding myself and others who'd listen that my childhood, for its time and place, was not all bad.

Meg said...

And I thank you, lovely souls, for the comments you left. Every bit is reassuring, and comments from different backgrounds and different experiences help me balance myself.

Dorothy said...

Dear Meg, glad you feel a bit better.

Being a problem child makes you so much more interesting to know!!

I've been thinking recently what a wonderful idea your S.S.V.E. is, getting weavers in different places co-ordinated to do something together. Maybe I can get myself organised to enter this special event next year.

Meg said...

We should create something like a problem child group, you know.

The hardest part of SSVE is the weaving my piece, Dorothy. The rest is quite easy. I, too, have a very hard time trying to organize myself to meet the deadline!